I have a wonderful support network, including you lovely folks who read this blog. And by and large, I have experienced very little unwelcome advice concerning my breast cancer treatment. Very little. Much less than I expected.
There is one little arena into which some unwelcome advice has crept. I have gotten some negative feedback about my choices regarding breast reconstruction. A couple of voices have opined that I should skip reconstruction. I’ve also fielded the opinion that I should opt for an implant rather than a TRAM surgery (transplantation of belly fact and some abdominal muscle to make a new breast) because the former is a simpler surgery and the latter involves a more major surgery (abdominal and breast).
While I haven’t been floored by the opinions and no one has been super insistent, I would be lying to say that they didn’t bother me. I did examine the part that bothered me to make sure that I’m not doubting my own decision. I concluded that based on the information I have now (since I can’t predict the future), I made the best decision for ME. Also it is a little extra annoying when the opinions have been stated AFTER I’ve already done a number of steps, including two surgeries, which are prepping my body for the TRAM surgery. If I had chosen an implant, which I think is a fine option, by the way, I would have had different procedures done.
We are fortunate to have a number of options regarding breast reconstruction. All of the options have major pluses and minuses. Not all of the options are available for every breast cancer survivor due to finances, particular breast cancer treatment regimen, body weight, smoker/non-smoker etc.
My personal opinion is that there is no perfect solution but there are a number of alternatives, often more than one of them being satisfactory for a given individual. But the ultimate choice is individual so folks, if you would kindly keep these typically well-intended opinions to yourself, we breast cancer ladies would be much obliged.
P.S. I know that I have also lost 31 pounds since May. My plastic surgeon assures me that I still have enough belly fat to make a new breast. Yay, belly fat!
My mom loved her TRAM flap reconstruction!! It’s your body!! You get to choose! Rock on!
Who doesn’t love helpful and not so helpful advice. It gives you a chance to re-visit your situation, and know that you have chosen the method that is best for you.
Karen is right, that is a good way of looking at it, Mom.
Good mom advice too!
Ahh, the well-meaning/sometimes not-so-well-meaning assvice people give related to someone else’s specific condition, body, mind, and life. Gotta love it. I’m glad you aren’t getting very much of it AND that you’re confident in your own well-considered decisions. Also: If you need extra belly fat, call me.
I see by your spelling that you are not a fan of unwelcome advice, either!
I wanna see your TRAM boob and tummy tuck incision. Much cooler than a generic breast reconstruction.
Well Beth if you are headed this way in September, I will probably be ready for show-and-tell, just for you.
You’re right – you have to be the one to make the best decision for YOU! I’m glad you are feeling comfortable with your decision.