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Dr. Welk came by this morning and said that surgery had gone really well. He was jazzed and even gave me the physician-patented foot squeeze on his way out.

I have transitioned from I.V. to oral pain meds and two hours later, I am feeling comfortable is the hospital bed.

I walked a lap around the ward. I was pretty tired by the end but it was good to get up and around.

Heather, the nurse even gave me an ice pack for my hotflashes. Sweet! 

There’s a possibility that I will go home tonight. I hope I will be well enough to do so because it’s hard to rest at the hospital.

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My husband asked me to take over dinner preparation because he was feeling hot and his stomach hurt.

Maybe he caught my hot flashes. “Menopause” does start with “men”.

Alas, it sounds like he has come down with something. I hate to put him in quarantine but I just got over being sick and I don’t want to be a member of that club again for a long while.

I am sending him healing thoughts from the other room, between applications of hand sanitizer.

They’re back!

The hot flashes, that is. Well, they didn’t really go away entirely but they had settled down to a dull roar of 2-3 a day instead of 12-15 a day.

I got my three month Lupron shot last Thursday. This usually causes a few days of increased hot flashes.

It’s still not up to the 12-15/day rate, and for this I am grateful.

I’m trying extra hard not to think about the possibility of going through menopause all over again after I come off of Lupron in a couple of years. Not to mention the prospect of having cycles again! Don’t take away one of the few bonuses of breast cancer treatment!

I know, inconvenience is the kind of problem to have. But I’m going to let myself whine about this just a little bit.

Okay, I’m done whining. I feel better now. I’m going to go make a meatloaf, complete with gluten free bread crumbs.

My grandma took a lot of nutritional supplements and thought a lot about nutrition. She worked at a health food store, Ames’ Nutrition, until she was about 80. In some respects, she was far ahead of her time, for example her concern about cholesterol. Other times, her beliefs and health practices struck me as eccentric and at times, down right illogical. Like the time she asked for a whole wheat bun at Burger King. Maybe she thought by requesting whole wheat, it would help the fast food chain reconsider their offerings. Okay, now that doesn’t sound so illogical. A better example would be when she put honey in my grandpa’s eyes to help his cataracts. Grandma always carried a large purse. When we had some kind of ailment, she often had some remedy in there. She always had papaya enzyme tablets in there, in case someone had indigestion.

My father-in-law was visiting recently. He got a look at my pill box and was impressed by the size of the daily compartments. After many years of just taking vitamin D and calcium, I am now taking A LOT of supplements. I laugh at myself and think, “I am one of those crazy supplement people. One of the pod people.” Cancer has made me more like my grandmother than I had expected to be.

So what supplements are in the enormous pockets of my pill organizer, you ask? (Everything but the multi-vitamin are what my naturopath has recommended for me.)
Vitamin D (breast cancer prevention)
Vitamin E (tissue healing)
Fish oil (cancer prevention)
COQ10 (for cardiac health)
Bone Strength (combo of calcium and other goodies for the bones)
Zyflamend (combo of turmeric, ginger, and other anti-inflammatories for cancer prevention)
B12 to combat fatigue
B Complex for stress
GLA (gamma-linolenic acid) cancer prevention and skin health
Magnesium Citrate-for sleep and to keep me regular ’cause the 2 TB flax meal is not enough for a lady on hormone blockers
Multiple Vitamin (You know, just in case I missed anything.)

I have a definite sense of style. When I was a young girl, most of my clothes were used, hand-me-downs from my brothers or from the local used clothing store. Now it is kind of cool to wear second hand clothes. Back then, it was definitely not cool to do so. And I had interesting taste when I was younger, to put it mildly. When I was 10, I saw these shoes at the second hand store that I really wanted. They were flat and brightly colored. I know that green was one of the colors and there was another one, too. I was happily wearing them at school when one of the older kids recognized what they were. “Hey, she’s wearing bowling shoes!” And upon seeing the $1.49 price marked on the sole in grease pencil, “And they’re used!”

As I got older, my style got more sophisticated. As an adult, I dress pretty nicely for work. I am embarrassed to admit how much I like to shop for dresses and shoes. I hate “going shopping” though and buy nearly all of my clothes online at discount sites.

When I’m not at the office, however, I am much more about “function” than “form.” This is particularly true of the outfit I wear for my daily 3 mile long walks. And as a resident of Seattle, I have nearly every inch of me covered in Gore-Tex. My neighbor, Paula, who works for the famous outdoor recreation outfitters, REI, makes fun of my outfit. I don’t know, I think it is cat walk ready. Maybe I’ll get hired to do a Cabela’s ad to be featured in Field and Stream.

For the breast cancer survivor on the go. The latest in waterproof walking attire, complete with hot flash friendly layering.

For the breast cancer survivor on the go. The latest in waterproof walking attire, complete with hot flash friendly layering.

Sorry for my absence. There are lots of holiday preparations going on in addition to the regular routine.

I’ll be back!

This is a beautifully written and expressed piece by Tracy, who writes FEC-THis, a blog about her experience with breast cancer. Tracy lives in Great Britain, is in her early 40’s, and has a teenaged son.
And yes, this is the same Tracy who writes thoughtful and supportive comments on my blog.

 

THAT question and why I will never ask it.

In actuality, my sleep has improved ever so slightly. But I am still working from a several month pattern of interrupted sleep as well as stress, all things that can impact the smart part of my brain. I keep running into the consequences of bad brain days and today I discovered that my bad brain days preceded my breast cancer diagnosis.

Every year, I have to renew my Washington State Psychology license. The renewal date is my birthday—that’s the way the licensing board likes to honor us. “Happy Birthday, please send us $316 or if you would prefer to wait until after your birthday, please send us $471.”

Every three years, I have to sign a statement that I have met the continuing education requirements. I do a lot of continuing education so this is no big deal. In all of the years I’ve done more than the required amount without even thinking about it all that much.

Did I say, “In all of the years…?” Well, today I found out that during the last three years, not only have I not completed more than my minimum amount of continuing education, but as of 8 am this morning, I hadn’t even finish 50% of the required amount. In truth, I’d completed a little over a third. What happened three years ago? What kind of horrible stress could have occurred that took me so off of my game? Hmmmm.

Oh yeah, three years ago, I became a parent to an adolescent!

Well, there’s nothing like realizing that I have to do two years of continuing education in two weeks to get the old adrenaline pumping. Also, the B12 that I started taking this week does seem to be boosting my energy a little. So far, I’ve gotten about 6 months worth done. That has meant a lot of reading, listening to webcasts, and last but not least, a lot of money paid to take the continuing education tests online. I’ve also been using my printer like crazy to get hard copies of the reading materials. The printer could have used a little B12 this morning, too. It is almost out of black ink and is printing only intermittently as it is in “Cool down mode.” I’m glad my printer has good self care skills and can set healthy limits with me.

The other limit setters, however, was my credit card company! Concerned about wanton spending on educational materials for psychologists, they disabled my card, right when I was buying three courses, one on childhood bipolar disorder, another on mindfulness, and the last on behavioral sleep medicine. (And in respect to the last two courses, I did some others this morning related to self-care, namely some ethics courses on handling a serious illness and it’s impact on one’s competency.) About five minutes after my card was disabled, an agent from the fraud department called, asked me a bunch of questions, apologized, and reset my card. At the end of the call, he informed me that I had $18K left to my credit card limit. I promised him that I wouldn’t spend it all on continuing education classes, at least today. He laughed. I bet he would have thought yesterday’s tattoo joke was funny, too.

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Lindbergh High School Reunion '82, '83, '84, '85

Join us this summer for our reunion in Renton, WA!

George Lakoff

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